3 Ways to Share with Your ADHD Valentine

Celebrate Valentine’s Day with REAL Heart!

This week, television shows, Hallmark cards and advertisements tell us repeatedly that Valentine’s Day is about celebrating love–romantic love, familial love, friendship love. I even saw a Valentine’s Day card for your dog! It can all be a bit overwhelming, especially if you are feeling less loving than the commercials suggest you should be. I would like to suggest that you can transform this day into something meaningful for you and your ADHD son or daughter by being authentic and acknowledging what is positive in your relationship. Often we are so busy with our chaotic lives that we neglect to notice and name things that are going well and move quickly onto what isn’t working. While it is great to give and receive funny cards and candy on Valentine’s Day, it can also feel wonderful to share and name things that family members like and appreciate about each other. It might sound corny but such conversations or written words, however brief, can have lasting effects. Taking the time to add your own comments about a positive behavior or attitude on a card or at a meal will show that you really see your child’s efforts to do well and encourage more of them. Even teenagers who can seem indifferent or combative to you actually listen to your positive feedback. The trick is keeping your comments “short and sweet”: you have to grab their attention, be succinct and speak genuinely or your ADHD son or daughter will smell a rat and stop listening immediately. Here are my tips for a Valentine’s Day with REAL heart for you and your ADHD child: 1. Talk to your family and set a time for Valentine’s Day cards, gifts or exchanges. It doesn’t have to be a big deal; just a time when everyone can be together. Make an agreement about the general plan: “We will be giving cards and not gifts.” Or, “We will give gifts that are homemade only.” Or, “No cards, no gifts, only chocolate.” Do what seems natural for your family. Participation is not mandatory but attendance is. 2. If you give cards, write a few things that your son or daughter does that you like. BE SPECIFIC. “I like how you hum when you eat your food.” “I love when you give me a hug before bed.” “I appreciate when you clear your plate after dinner.” “I like your sense of style, even though it’s different from mine.” If you are doing a verbal exchange, plan what you have to say so you it doesn’t seem like you are making things up at the last minute. 3. When you get together as a family, share your cards or comments without elaborating or dwelling on them. Your ADHD son or daughter has a limited attention span and we want this to be fun. Lingering on topics, even if they are good ones, promotes distractedness. Reciprocity and connection, however brief, are the goals here. Enjoy an authentic Valentine’s Day! Please let me know how this goes!

Distraction with Dr. Ned Hallowell featuring Dr. Sharon Saline on 5 Daily Habits to Help Your Child Succeed

Dr. Hallowell talks to celebrated psychologist, Dr. Sharon Saline about the key components she believes will help parents to raise empowered and confident children with ADHD. This is a powerful episode with insights for the entire family.

Great Holiday Gift Ideas for Kids with ADHD

Do you struggle with what to give your son or daughter with ADHD that doesn't involve the latest version of Fortnight or the newest smartphone? You are not alone. Thinking of good gifts, buying them in time for the holidays and keeping them out of sight challenges most parents. This year, I'm sharing some of my favorite gift items that foster fun, family connections and pique kids' interest while simultaneously improving executive functioning skills. To make things easy, there are links to each item on Amazon but I also encourage you to check out stores near you and support your local economy. https://drsharonsaline.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/iStock-875268918.jpg Gifts to help moving hands and fidgeting bodies: Kids (and adults) with ADHD like to keep their hands active as a way to focus their attention. When the hands are busy, the background buzzing in the mind quiets down so people can concentrate. In my office, these are beloved: entire families will be using them from the time they enter the session until it's over.

1. The Infinity Cube:  https://amzn.to/2Q628cE 
2. Neliblu Tracks Snap and Click Fidget toys: https://amzn.to/2Qthk2A

Games that the whole family can enjoy: Who doesn't enjoy a good laugh and some good clean fun? No matter their age, most kids like to play games, even if they struggle with losing. Whether card games, board games or puzzles, these activities offer your family a chance to play together while helping your son or daughter with anything from reading social cues, using visual-spatial skills and even applying math. Don't be discouraged by adolescent negativity: even teens like to participate in something amusing.

1. CARD GAMES: Uno https://amzn.to/2TUY0dp, Rat-A-Tat-Cat https://amzn.to/2QoYQ3d  and Monopoly Deal https://amzn.to/2Azk2JW .
2. BOARD GAMES: Yahtzee https://amzn.to/2RkOO0s, Headbanz  https://amzn.to/2Sk4wsW  and Sorry https://amzn.to/2RmgkKS
3. MAKING THINGS: Jenga https://amzn.to/2KHQnTE, Ravensburger puzzles are sturdy and colorful https://amzn.to/2RiF7Q0 (work on these, take a break and come back to finish them later), Coloring books with good pencils and, of course, Legos.

https://drsharonsaline.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/iStock-845636024-e1543461205594.jpg Practical and Fun Gifts : Time Timers https://amzn.to/2DN9ASx, Watchminders (fun way to to help kids and adults with reminders and schedules without buying an expensive Apple watch) http://www.watchminder.com/, and FiveHome Alarm Clocks (for that extra alarm across the room so kids actually get out of bed) https://amzn.to/2PazMZ8 Any reading material: Whether kids like to read or listen to them, books, including comic books and graphic novels or magazines are a great gift to feed the imagination without electronics. Go with topics or authors they already like to further their interest.  Good luck on your holiday shopping. Help yourself stay organized by making a list on your phone where you can't lose it and enjoy crossing things off as you take care of them. Be sure to reward yourself along the way with a steaming cup of hot chocolate with whipped cream or a double cappuccino. You've earned it!

Helping Kids with ADHD get more ZZZZ's

If your son or daughter has trouble going to sleep, you are not alone. There are several issues that complicate going to sleep for kids with ADHD. Some kids are sensitive to the medication they take and it can negatively impact their ability to drift into slumber. If they take a booster after-school to help with doing homework, this can be especially true. Perhaps your child is not be that physically tired. Vigorous, regular exercise could help them nod off more easily. Many kids today (those with and without ADHD) also tend to spend too much time on their screens too close to bedtime. Most physicians (and many sleep studies) recommend turning off screens at least one hour prior to bed. If you have an teen in your midst, the onset of adolescence and its hormonal and psychological changes can further prevent getting some good shut-eye.   Here are a few steps that you can take to help your child or teen get a good night’s rest: Start with making an appointment with whoever prescribes his medication. It’s very important that they know what is going on so they can make any appropriate changes or suggestions about his sleep challenges. Reflect on your family's evening routine. Is there adequate time built-in for chilling out before turning off the light? What have you (or your partner) observed that has helped your son or daughter in the past? Jot down these ideas. In a calm moment, perhaps after dinner, talk with your child or teen about the issue of going to sleep. The goal is to collaborate on sleep solutions, not get into a blame game or an argument. If you find yourself getting agitated or they starts to become defensive, pause and take some deep breaths together. Begin by asking about falling asleep. Is he tired? Is she frustrated? What would they like to see that’s different from what’s going on now? Talk about why you also want a better routine.  Discuss the skill of self-regulation--the ability for kids with ADHD to manage themselves--and how it relates to sleep challenges. What do they notice on those nights when sleep comes easily? What is or isn’t happening at those times compared to the nights when it’s tougher? Review the nightly routine and share your observations too. Should you replace pre-sleep stimulation like playing computer games, using social media or surfing the net with quieter brain activities? If they report worrying a lot before bed, consider seeking counseling. Brainstorm ways to create a routine that integrates what has helped them in the past with what could be useful now. Just like you’ve developed ways to get yourself to sleep, your child or teen needs to learn this same skill. Set up a new plan for the hour before bed. Listening to music, riding a stationary bike, watching a regular TV show or working on a big puzzle or fun project with a parent can all be good  substitutions for computer games and social media time. Once they are under the covers, if they are willing to read anything--the sports page, a graphic novel or a mystery, establish an endpoint for that. If reading is not an option,  maybe listening aloud to a podcast, an audio book, a relaxation exercise or quiet music could work. Be clear and specific. The time before sleep is often when kids want to chat about their lives. They seem more open to confide in you and ask for your advice. Prop your own eyelids open and to sit down for a few minutes. The connection will be worth it!

Transforming the ‘Witching’ Hour to the ‘Working’ Hour

Does your family struggle with the ‘witching hour’–the time of day when your son or daughter with ADHD transitions off their medication? Several things combine to make this a challenging situation for everyone. Your child or teen, like many kids with ADHD, works hard all day to hold it together in an academic and social environment they may or may not like. Perhaps they eat lunch but maybe not. After arriving home, it’s almost as if a switch flips and they let it all go. Without the medication’s positive effect on their brains, they simply can’t handle emotions or behavior as effectively.

The good news is that most kids feel some kind of remorse when their outbursts are over.Nobody feels good after they ‘lose it.’ If they could do something else when they’re upset, they would. How they handle this remorse—often with self-deprecation or isolation–can be problematic. We want to work with their desire to behave differently in those moments, even though they can’t imagine any alternatives in the rush of emotions. Underneath the anger they’re showing you, they likely feel guilty and ashamed.  I’m sure you both agree that behavior like being mean or throwing chairs are not acceptable family behaviors. Any awareness your son or daughter offers about their behavior gives you a golden opportunity to collaborate on figuring out a predictable plan that empowers everyone.

Collaboration, meaningful incentives and making amends are the most effective ways to create lasting change with ADHD kids. Collaboration increases their buy-in to any problem-solving process; incentives provide the motivational push they often need; making amends gives them a chance to do something nice for someone they’ve hurt. In this situation, collaboration means discussing neutrally what occurs before, during and after their eruptions and brainstorming alternatives together. Incentives for things they like to do will assist them in sticking with the plan. You teach them necessary coping skills and accountability while they work towards something desirable.Making amends happens after they’ve cooled down from an incident. Everyone wins.

Try these tips for dealing with the ‘witching hour:’

1. Start by discussing the physiology of what’s happening in his body so he can stop putting himself down for a biological process. Explain that when the medication wears off, his brain lacks the support it needs to control his behavior as effectively. It’s not his fault but he has to make different choices when this occurs. As a family, you’re going to work together and find better solutions.
2. Next, look at the hunger factor. Is he eating when he gets home from school? I’ve found that if teen has a protein-rich snack when they get home, the transition off medication goes more smoothly. Whether it’s a bagel with cream cheese or a peanut butter sandwich getting him some healthy calories will really help.
3. Figure out what signals his body sends when his medication is wearing off. Most kids sense when this happening but may not have identified the signs specifically. Ask him what behaviors are okay and what are unacceptable during this transition and then share your opinions. Write these ideas down.
4. Reflect on a time when he handled this transition well and what made that successful. Offer some suggestions based on your observations. Discuss what might be helpful during those initial moments when he notices changes. Maybe create a codeword like ‘volcano’ or ‘T-Rex’ for him to use when it’s happening. Write all of this down.
5. Make a list of activities that matter to him to use as incentives for following the plan. Make a list of things he can do for others when he’s not able to.
6. Now, create your plan. When he comes home from school, what does he do and in what order? Perhaps he snacks immediately and then does homework, earning extra screen time when it’s finished. Perhaps he does his homework followed by an early dinner, a game or tv show with you. Maybe he goes to his room to decompress for a limited amount of time before homework and earns computer minutes if there’s no arguing. If he can’t follow through, then he makes amends. While there’s mutual input, you, as the parent, have the final say. The key is making sure he feels like he is part of the solution, not just the problem. Post your agreement in the kitchen where everyone can refer to it.

When kids with ADHD understand that their biology fundamentally affects their behavior and when they perceive that you want to work with them to make different choices, they will try alternative solutions. Notice their efforts and encourage them along the way.

Settling in for a successful fall semester: Overcoming 3 common challenges for college students with ADHD

Now that the rush of moving into dorms, finalizing schedules and purchasing books and supplies has waned, the real work of being in college begins. For students with ADHD, this usually means settling down to business: figuring out how to manage your workload, stay up-to date with assignments and  use your time effectively. If you add seeing your friends, extracurricular activities, eating, sleeping and doing laundry, it all seem daunting. The trick is creating systems that make sense to you and help you overcome the temptations that lead to procrastination, avoidance and exhaustion. Many of the college students I speak with struggle most with the ‘When, Where, What and How’ of budgeting their time, especially about studying. Questions such as “When to do assignments? Where should I study? What need to be prioritized? and How long can I really work?” can be so daunting that folks will avoid doing anything and opt for surfing the net or hanging out with friends. Unfortunately, procrastination often leads to panic, all-nighters, exhaustion and further procrastination. What else can you do? To get yourself going, you’ll need a doable plan: one that involves making lists, using calendars and breaking things down into chunks. There’s no other way around these things. Yes, they’re tough--tough for everyone I’ve ever met with ADHD because of the executive functioning challenges that come with this diagnosis. Developing these skills requires time, practice and, above all, compassion. Accepting your ADHD brain and making lasting changes for academic and life success begins with having compassion for yourself. Everybody has strengths and weaknesses--things we like about ourselves and things we want to change. If you can shift your mindset from criticism and negativity (“What’s wrong with me?” and “Why can’t I be more like so-and-so?”) to one of curiosity and openness (“What could I do differently here?” and “Who might be able to help me?”), you’ve made a giant step in the right direction. Here are 5 common challenges for college students and practical steps for overcoming them: creating your path to success this semester: PROBLEM 1: Lack of motivation to do your work:  It's easy to do something you like and MUCH harder to do something that you don't. When a task feels big and is fundamentally unrewarding, no matter how important, and you avoid doing it, you lack internal motivation. Even if you like a subject, doing the reading or problem sets might be uninteresting sometimes. When a task doesn't have meaningful deadlines or immediate consequences to get us started, it lacks external motivation. In both cases, we have to find something to get us going. Procrastination occurs when tasks are both unrewarding and daunting. Solution: Break things down and use incentives: You’ll need to take two important steps. First, create meaningful incentives to get yourself going. These will be your rewards for finishing something that is difficult to do. Make a list of things you enjoy doing and attach them to things you have to do but don’t love. For example, if you turn in a statistics assignment on time, you go for a run or treat yourself to a cappuccino at your favorite cafe. Secondly, it’s hard to begin something that seems unpleasant when the task seems very large. Create chunks of time to study smaller amounts of work. You want to finish things so you feel a sense of completion and success. Decide on your overall work period and how long you want your breaks to be. Let’s say you can work for 45 minutes, break for 10 and work for another 45 before you call it quits. Set your timer on your phone for your work periods and your break. If you’re studying with or near friends and need some help, ask. They want you to do well and will probably be more than happy to assist you.  PROBLEM 2: Overwhelmed by too many responsibilities: College is a time filled with many demands on your time. You likely have multiple deadlines for different classes, a campus job, extracurricular activities, social events: it’s a lot to keep track of. Things can easily slip through the cracks, causing difficulties with professors, employers and friends. Solution: Create a visual map of your life: People with ADHD respond well to visual cues so laying things out in a way that’s easy for you to check on what’s happening and what’s due is essential. Whether you do this on your computer or the old-fashioned way with a planner or calendar is up to you. Sometimes a combination works best. One of my clients likes to put her academic assignments on a paper calendar so she can look at a month and see what she has to do but puts all of her social and medical appointments and shifts at her job in her phone with alerts. Another student created an Excel spreadsheet while a third uses Google calendar for everything. Take some to reflect on what makes the most sense to you. Write down everything: the big picture of when classes, your job and non-academic activities occur and the due dates of assignments, papers and tests. Make sure you schedule study blocks and meals too. This map will help you navigate your days more smoothly. PROBLEM 3: Losing things and disorganization: If you have trouble keeping track of your stuff or making sure the clean laundry doesn’t mingle with the dirty stuff, you are not alone. Losing keys, your identification card or a favorite jacket seems to happen to many college students. It can be frustrating and embarrassing, not to mention costly. Solution: Make sure everything has a place: Whether it’s a designated shelf for your phone or purse or a particular file for returned assignments and tests, you’ll perform better when you know where things should go. The trick is developing a habit of putting them. Think about what’s helped you in the past and what seems natural to you. Could this be useful now or do you need a new option? Create a routine where you come into your room and drop your stuff immediately in its special place. If you try a system and it’s not working, regroup and try something else. It’s not a big deal; it’s just information about what’s most useful. Sometimes it’s tough to do these steps on your own. If you think outside support would be helpful, seek it out.  Whether it’s another student, a learning specialist, an ADHD coach or a therapist, you may well benefit from teaming up with someone. Remember, everyone needs assistance sometimes. There is no reward for struggling on your own.

CoreBrain Journal: What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew

[Dr. Sharon Saline’s] unique perspective – as a sibling in an ADHD home, combined with decades of experience as a clinical psychologist and educator/clinician consultant – assists her in guiding families and adults towards effective communication and closer connections.

22 News Mass Appeal: The five things children with ADHD want you to know

“If you’re a parent or grandparent of a child with ADHD, it can be hard to get inside their head – and just know what they’re expecting. Good news, though, we had Dr. Sharon Saline, author of  “What your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew,”  give us the five things your little one wishes you knew. ”

ADDitude Magazine: Stop Fighting with Your Teen—5 Transformative Strategies

When tangling with teen moods and defiance, it’s easy to forget you’re on the same team! Both you and your teen want him to succeed. Use these five strategies to avoid the dynamics that pit kids against their parents, and help no one.

NONFICTION4LIFE: What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew

Tune in to #Nonfiction4Life episode 59! In this podcast, Janet speaks with Dr. Sharon Saline about her new book “WHAT YOUR ADHD CHILD WISHES YOU KNEW: WORKING TOGETHER TO EMPOWER KIDS FOR SUCCESS IN SCHOOL AND LIFE.” In her #book, psychologist Saline shares the thoughts of kids & teenagers with #ADD and #ADHDand how parents and educators can use #easystrategies to create lasting #positiveimpact in their lives. You don’t want to miss this one!

Psychology Today: Studying Tips for a Successful Semester

How college students with ADHD can overcome three common challenges

Now that the rush of moving into dorms, finalizing schedules, and purchasing books and supplies has waned, the real work of being in college begins. For students with ADHD, in particular, this means figuring out how to manage your workload, stay up-to-date with assignments, and use your time effectively. If you add seeing friends, extracurricular activities, eating, sleeping, and doing laundry, it can all seem daunting. The trick is creating systems that make sense to you and help you overcome the temptations that lead to procrastination, avoidance, and exhaustion.

continue reading…

Back-to-School Basics: Collaboration Leads to Academic Success

As schools open their doors for students, it’s time once more to begin thinking about the year ahead. For many kids, and especially those with ADHD, summer is a huge relief from academic and social pressures. Most of them don’t relish the return to classes and would rather think about anything else. How can you set your child up for success? Most parents of kids with and without ADHD harbor a number of goals for their children related to school:  learn and retain information, obtain good grades, behave appropriately, etc. These are all important facets of a thorough education. But children and teens with ADHD need something more. Struggling academically and/or socially, they benefit from goals that address their strengths while shoring up their challenges. If your son doesn’t like math but loves creative writing, how can his interest be incorporated into learning algebra? If your daughter adores art and doing things with her hands, how can she do science or history projects that capitalize on her skills?  Approaching this year with an eye towards including such possibilities will improve your child’s engagement and performance. Setting a positive course for this year depends on collaborating with your son or daughter to establish clear goals and useful strategies. Kids with ADHD spend a lot of time listening to what they could do differently from caring adults, friends, coaches, etc. They often believe that feedback is a euphemism for criticism. Well-intentioned suggestions may not fit with how their ADHD brains think and make it tough to follow through. If kids with ADHD aren’t able to express what makes sense to them and have it become part of a problem-solving process, any sound advice will likely fall flat. I’m not saying that a young person should dictate what’s going to happen. Rather, I’m advocating that you include some of their opinions in whatever program you create to ensure their buy-in. When they feel like their ideas matter, these kids are far more likely to cooperate. Start this school year with a calm, honest family conversation. This chat sets the tone for how you will work together to make it a success. Ask yourself and your son or daughter these questions:

• What do you hope for your son or daughter this year?
• What went well last year and why?
• Can you identify any behaviors or decisions that made a positive difference?
• What were some of the challenges? What improved them?
• What type of teacher feedback did you receive that would be useful this year?
• What, if any, concerns do you have about this year?

Write down everyone’s answers and look for overlaps. Together, decide on a goal that would address your mutual concerns. Pick one that would be the easiest to start with (an early success builds confidence) and begin to brainstorm a plan for working on it.  Write down these ideas too and post your new plan in the kitchen. This way everybody can refer back to it. Establish a weekly time to check in on the progress toward your goal. When it’s going well, consider adding a new goal but keep up your encouragement and support for the first one. Good luck and here’s to great beginnings!

Parenting ADHD Podcast: with Dr. Sharon Saline

In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, Penny talks with Dr. Sharon Saline (August 2018) about what your child with ADHD wishes you knew, in conjunction with the release of Dr. Saline’s new book. We’re talking about how most kids feel like parents aren’t hearing what they’re saying, and vice versa. Dr. Saline offers many strategies to communicate better, for a more successful and joyful family life.

ImpactADHD: 5 Things ADHD Kids Want Parents To Do Differently

Sharon Saline knows a thing or two about what complex kids want. Read 5 Things ADHD Kids Want Parents To Do Differently (August 2018)

HuffPost: How To Break Up With Your Therapist And Start Over With A New one

Good news: You don’t have to share your life story from the beginning. Read Nicole Pajer’s How To Break Up With Your Therapist And Start Over With A New One. July 2018

Succeed with ADHD TeleSummit

Soundcloud.

Parenting ADHD Summit: Understanding the Adolescent Brain

Dr. Saline was one of 36 experts included in this online summit. Parenting ADHD Summit: “Understanding the Adolescent Brain: Raise Competent, Resilient Teens“, July 2018  

Your Teen Ready for College

During this special online interview series, you’ll hear from 21 experts, including Dr. Saline, about the latest trends in college admissions, SAT tutoring, psychology, parenting, study skills, and college essays and more. Your Teen Ready for College: “Building better brains: How improving executive functioning skills fosters academic success“, July 14, 2018  

ADDitude Magazine: My Teen Gets Too Distracted When Doing Homework on the Computer!

High schools today assume that students will receive and complete assignments in the Cloud. This means heavy computer use, and even heavier temptation for procrastination and distraction online. How can you teach your teen to manage his screen time without hovering, spying, or arguing daily? Read My Teen Gets Too Distracted When Doing Homework on the Computer! (August 2018)

Fear of mistakes? Help your child with ADHD keep trying.

"If I don't try, I can't fail!" and "If I can't do it right, why bother at all?" These are common refrains I hear from ADHD kids who come into my office.

What is this unwillingness to try really about? Laziness, boredom, self-criticism?

No, I don't believe so.

When children and teens with ADHD don't want to make efforts or take risks, it's usually because they have too many limiting beliefs about themselves. Either they think they mostly fail and want to avoid more defeats, or they think that it's not acceptable for them to make mistakes. In both cases, the result is inaction.

Kids with ADHD usually have grown up with a series of negative comments about that are labeled "constructive feedback." Actually, these statements feel anything but constructive. One 10-year-old boy told me "There's nothing good about feedback. It's usually bad." Even parental or teacher redirections are interpreted by kids and their concrete thinking as them being wrong, bad or improper. Avoidance and perfectionism can then emerge as coping mechanisms. Children and especially teens with ADHD can be expert avoiders. Tired of feeling wrong or doing poorly in school more often than not, they just give up. Perfectionism in kids with ADHD usually comes from feeling like they are never good enough. It can stop them from starting anything, especially writing, before they even begin. Sometimes they will agonize for hours which will delay them even more.

How can we keep your sons and daughters engaged and willing to attempt things?

Here are some helpful hints:

• Acknowledge past mistakes as something that happened but aren't who they are.

  Since learning means messing up, regrouping and doing things anyway, investigate the details of what occurred with the original mistake.

• Ask questions with no blame and a neutral tone of voice like you are a detective:

  "What happens when you sit down for a test in biology? I saw you study at home. . . What might have helped you before the test that you now know based on your experience?"

• Break tasks down into smaller, more manageable parts.

  When something seems overwhelming, difficult or uninteresting, start small. Together, choose some fun activities that can be used as incentives. "Instead of creating all 5 paragraphs of your book report, let's just work on the first one. Then we can play a game of cards and do the second." Your assistance and even sometimes just your presence can be the difference between doing nothing and starting something.

• Be open about the mistakes you make.

  Talk about them and what you did to deal with your errors. By doing this, you not only model your own flaws and problem-solving skills but also the shared human experience of having foibles in the first place.

• Practice self-forgiveness and accountability.

  Let your kids see how you do this and verbalize it for them as well. Watching you shows that they can do it too.

Addressing these challenges takes time. Be patient with yourself and your ADHD child or teen. If you notice that you are frustrated, take some space, regroup and try again later when you are calmer. Remember, any negativity from you about avoidance and perfectionism only makes these tendencies stronger.

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Learn more:

• Read - Perfectionism and ADHD: Why ‘good enough’ is better than perfect
• Read - 6 Helpful Tips for Dealing with Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria